I had one of the most fucked up days that I've had in a couple of years this past Sunday. So here's the story, hopefully I can tell it well:
To understand the situation as a whole, I must begin with a backstory. I believe I have mentioned my old friend Mike Schooler before, he lived with me when I returned to Minneapolis after freshman year. He was our couch dude, he paid no rent, bought a cornucopia of liquor for the house, and liked to have sex on bubble wrap. He'd scream and moan on his guitar and we'd all clap along
At this point Schooler was already a severe alcoholic, but since we were 19 and liked to party it didn't really grate anyone the wrong way. A couple of times he got down with too much whiskey and we had to take the bottle away, another couple of times I just laid him out when he tried to throw a punch, but it was all in good fun. He had his shit to deal with, but then again his childhood was nothing to celebrate.
A year and a half ago though, shit hit the fan in a big way. His favorite younger brother, his partner in crime as they were growing up, hung himself in jail. That's hard for anyone to take, but since Schooler can't normally find the area between current and past too well, he began blaming himself for the entire thing, whether at all rightfully or not. Not to say that suicide can ever be truly prevented, it cannot, it's a choice between a human and their body, not anyone else, but the history between the two of them really lends itself to be transferred onto his conscience.
Since then Schooler has been on one long binge with occasional moments of video game soaked quasi-sobriety. He put down his guitar and became a homeless person living off the strained charity of our friend group. But up to a few months, as grody as his slobbering drunk nights became, we were still willing to put up with him in the hopes that with a few people making sure to push him forward he'd slowly come around, use it all to fuel his music. Instead last summer he wrapped his uninsured friends car around a tree and went to county jail in northern Minnesota for a couple of months. His uninsured friend bailed the state, so all the property damage and medical bills fell on Schooler's rotting shoulders.
After he got out of jail, there was maybe a month of clarity, he adjusted to not drinking on the daily and three square meals a day combined with a regimented life seemed to set him straight for a little while.
Then he became a thief... The one thing he always prided himself on is that as much of a bum as he'd become he'd never steal or take the last of anyone's anything, but the hunger got to him. He began walking into Rainbow and graze, which in and of itself isn't a problem, but the sandhill out of grains, eventually everybody falls.
The fall is what brings us up to my fucked up Sunday. On Friday night my good friends Kat and Shannon were having a birthday bash for Shannon. Jason and Travis were invited, so they brought Schooler along, not realizing that there would be free liquor there. I stayed home and passed out, exhausted by the stretch of celebrations from Halloween through election day, so here the story gets veiled for me. All I know is that when I wake up to open the door for Schooler on Saturday morning to find him with a paper bag of food in his hand and still so drunk that his eyes are bloodshot and watering. He mumbles something about raiding Kat's food, and passes out, the bag flying open to reveal a dozen eggs, cheese, bread, and other foodstuffs. Of course this is some bullshit, but I figure that it's just food and he's toasted, whatever happens, it can be smoothed over, so I go on with my day.
Then, for the entirety of the day, as I'm working at a coffee shop and chilling, I proceed to receive call after call, text after text, asking whether "the drunk asshole who passed out in the closet stole Kat and Shannon's food and Shannon's bike." I say yes to the food, but since he's my friend of almost four years I defend him, say it must have been another guest, even though I wasn't anywhere near the party.
I eventually make it home, after seeing Shannon at her first live concert, finding out how much this cruiser means to her, but Schooler and Enoch are drunk off their asses on bottom-of-the-barrel rum. As much as I want to sort shit out with him, I don't want to deal with the a drunk Schooler, so after he tries to casually bum a cigarette of me, I only slightly snap at him, shut my bedroom door, and pass out.
Sunday, finally we're up to Sunday, I wake up, brew myself a pot of French press, and head out onto my front stoop to smoke a cigarette and enjoy a moment of solitude. As my eyes slowly slide open after a few gulps, I take a closer look at the red scooter that sits on front of the main entrance, and realize that Shannon's cruiser is silhouetting it!
At that point I felt a cold fury that I haven't experienced, just knowing what has to be done without straight up snapping. I flew up the three flights of stairs, gathered all of Schooler's belongings within 5 minutes, threw them into his pack, and placed it near the couch where he was passed out. I then proceeded to grab him by the suspenders of his fucking Carhart overalls, threw him three feet across the living room to wake him, and proceeded to boot him from my place, and likely my life forever.
Both liberating and ostentatiously heart-breaking all at once. Until that piece of shit remnant of what used to be Mike finds where the rest of him is, he's no longer my friend. I love the guy to death, but the guy is no longer there.
I returned the bike to Shannon, which was actually really neat, since it's the first time I had the chance to chill with her for a bit, find out who she is and all that jazz, but still, fuck.
To throw in a bit of humor, as all tossing around was happening, my friend Bobby, who is terribly uncomfortable with confrontation, was in the next room, which happens to be the kitchen, head down, attempting invisibility as he furiously washed through a week's worth of dishes.
So that's about it, the day proceeded to get even stranger, but that requires even more background info, so c'est tout.
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